It's Your Thing

I AM THE OAK-Sasquatch Jones 2015

Taking time to reflect has proven most beneficial to my over all outlook. It seems ironic saying that after a back to back memorial and funeral weekend, but still true all the same. How I got here, and the treasures I found along the way to be subject of this tale, so get comfy and let me be your guide. In the most proverbial of ways I will  start at the beginning, of sorts.

The Year of Knives

"Do what you want to do, don't talk about what you don't want." - Misty Dawn, New Years Weekend-2015 This sage advice was dispensed by my wonderful partner and muse during a Hedge-crossing session on New Years weekend. It was during this journey that I began to think of 2015 as the Year of Knives. In recent years I have developed a habit of adopting names for the year, it helps me to focus my energy in certain ways, give a direction to my path. 2013 was the Year of Witches, by way of Thad McCracken, this helped me to rekindle embers that had lain dormant for far too long. 2014 was the Year of Ghosts thanks to Gordon at Rune Soup.Little did I realize that when I adopted these monikers the power they would have over my perceptions, just read back through my past posts,the evidence is all there.

KEYS TO THE GATE-Sasquatch Jones 2015

This year however, I have named, The Year of Knives, by this act I have already begun cutting away. The knife is a beautiful thing, useful, sexy and dangerous most of all, a knife cuts. Cuts away fat, cuts through butter, cuts up celery and sailors. Useful but possibly dangerous, like magick. In order for me to execute my plans I must cut away the unnecessary, cut through the cords that bind. I must be careful not to cut to close or I may end up drawing blood, possibly my own. Thus the Year of Knives is about transitions, such as leather becoming a boot, first you must cut out your pattern. There is an inherent warning here, knives draw blood, knives make permanent changes. There are rules to using knives.

The most important rule seems to be; Stay Sharp. A dull knife is a dangerous knife, if you want a cut that's deep and true, only a sharp knife will do. Secondly, one must be patient when using a knife. I have seen this sentiment expressed in the following manners. Measure twice cut once, take the time to make sure you cutting away the right amount. You can always cut away more but you cannot cut back more, proceed methodically and with intention. Lastly treat a knife with respect and the knife will express respect for you. Take care of your knife and it will serve you well. With my knife I carve out my world.

Living the Dream

I have been busy, but in the best of possible ways, doing what I want to do. This seemed to be the theme of this weekend also; two different people, two different lives, one central idea unites them. Both my mentor, Wes Nations aka Johnny Vagabond, and my wife's cousin dared to live their own lives despite what others might think. Both were warm and engaging people, who made friends with everyone they met, they were open, sharing, and inspiring. These two very different people shared the one thing I believe, is the secret to a good life; they dared to manifest their bliss.

At Wes's memorial and Brian's funeral, people talked about how awesome it was that these individuals got to live the lives they wanted. Again and again, always with a hint of sadness, not so much for the departed, but rather an admission that the speaker was not living the life they wanted. Having recently journeyed into the Otherworld and receiving instruction via dream-work, and ritual, I went into this weekend with more mental clarity than would have been possible in the past. My senses sharpened (thanks to Jason Miller and his book), I saw the connections between people, and the interconnectedness that united them all. Two men who dared to live their own lives became beacons to others, not because they set out to be inspirations, but because they were true to themselves. They were not living the "dream", they were living.

Manifesting Liberation

No more excuses, no more procrastinations. The time is now and it always has been and always will be. Sharpen your knives and make your cuts. Live out loud, yes this is a call to arms, an active initiation. The world will always try to stop you and crush you, surround yourself with the lights that inspire. Always be open to giving and receiving blessings, this magic will consistently exceed expectations. Know your allies on this side and in the Otherworld, maintain your relations. Focus your energy into your own endeavors, wishful thinking never manifests, action does.

My year has begun with a prolonged period of reflection punctuated by direct action and manifestation. Work with my spirit allies is yielding tremendous results with very clear messages and instructions. The work progresses and returns dividends on what is invested. By cutting away until I reveal only what I want, I have become more efficacious in my operations. Saint Cyprian and Santisima Muerte continue to bless me, as do Hekate, Mercury Cthonos, the Horned One, Owl Woman, Mother Bear, and the Ancestors. Most surprisingly of all is the influence of Dandelion, never under estimate that which is underfoot.

I have t-shirt designs to finalize and render. A website is in the works and seeds are being planted and tended. The upcoming year promises much and I welcome it with an open heart and a clear vision. The take away from my time of contemplation and reflection upon life can be summed up by the statements of my wife, as printed above and the following statements which came to me while driving home late last night. Seize the moment, seize the day and build relationships along the way.

The very last thing I want leave you with comes from Briana Saussy:

HONOR YOUR MAGIC AND IT WILL HONOR YOU.

Seeds of Possibility

Black Moon 23, Copyright 2013, Sasquatch Jones

Seeds. Genesis in a capsule. A seed contains everything to grow, bloom, and produce progeny. From humble beginnings, eh? Let it come to pass that this article will contains seeds with such power. That is my goal here to plant seeds, ideas, or memes, into as many fertile souls as I can. This is a working given to me, to set free into the world, whose full manifestation is beyond my imagination. Much in the same way as one cannot see a tree no matter how hard one stares at an acorn. But first let me tell you a story.

A Story of the Earth

Pom ov Possumbility, Copyright2014, Sasquatch Jones

I have been in the Earth. Deep into the Earth, die Unterwelt, at the roots of it all. I have been given gifts, seeds to share. Between meditations on death, Geist Arbeit, heart chakra openings, and a growing community of support, I have been blessed with a amazing gift. I present the Pomegranate of Possibility, infinitely filled with juicy kernels of wisdom, each containing a seed full of infinite possibility. From the fertile soil, which is the flesh of the Goddess herself, comes a gift from the Underworld, but be forewarned, once you eat of this fruit, you will never be the same.

I am tapping into roots. The first thing  to emerge from a seed  is the root. The roots provide sustenance to the emerging plant, that is how life begins, our roots sustain us. Working roots, whether vegetable or ancestral, always gives  sustenance to new work. I venerate the dead, as the song says, pray for the dead and the dead will pray for you. Some of them are personal, others are Elevated Ancestors, but all of them inform my work and provide me with sustenance, as all friends and allies do. As we pass through this Season of Earth, remember your roots, draw upon their strength.

Feast Upon Possibility

While tapping into my roots, I began remembering stories my Grandmother told me, and something started to stand out. When my Grandmother was a girl, most of the businesses in her hometown were owned by people who lived in her hometown. Think about it. A community supporting each other. That is what we are all seeking is it not? Most of us give far too much of our earnings to Corporations, large faceless and invested with far too much power. We have the power to change that and we are, every time you give your money to independent business people and artisans you are voting for a better world. Did I lose you?

Queen of the Crossroads, Copyright 2013, Sasquatch Jones

Consider for a moment our consumer culture as it goes through its Annual Orgy of Excess. Every dollar spent at a major retailer, gives more power to the lobbies that the owners of those companies give donations. So your dollars end up exerting influence in the true political system. When you buy from Independent Business People you subvert this system. I am not naive enough to believe that this is all it takes to save the world, but it could be the beginning of an alternative economy. You never know what will grow from a seed, but if you plant enough, you will always bear fruit. So vote for a better world by supporting superior craftsmanship, independence, and the reality you wish to manifest.

Share the Love

If you don't know where to start check out some of my favorites from around the way.

HOUSE OF ORPHEUS
LONE STAR BOTANICALS
WOLF & GOAT
NATURAL MAGICK SHOP
TVEIR HRAFNAR
THREE CATS AND A BROOM
CAULDRON CRAFT ODDITIES

Underneath the Snow a Seed Grows

Every seed is also a Snowflake. You might be planting beans or okra, but how each seed manifests will depend upon the experiences it has. No two are the same. Again I am planting seeds and waiting for manifestation. The fruits of past plantings are harvested, and being enjoyed. Others are only beginning to bear fruit. Return to the Pomegranate of Possibility as often as you need, its inspiration is infinite. Plant your seeds, and dig into your roots, good things await you.

Heathen Brujo, Copyright 2013, Sasquatch Jones

Breakdowns and Breakthroughs

About a week ago I crashed. I crashed hard, as if I fell thirty feet into an empty pool. This was just a precursor, the set up before the main act. In the depths of my fall, my wife, the most amazing intuitive healer I know, simply asked, "What do you need?" Without hesitation or thought applied I responded that I needed a shaman. She handed me a cigarette of tobacco and said, "This is shaman tobacco and it will heal you, because I say so." I smoked my first tobacco in many years and felt nauseous, sick, my head was spinning so hard I had to lie down. What happened next will change my life forever.

  

I awoke from a nap and I knew what had to happen. Into the bath I placed salt, damiana, and passion flower, everything seems to work better in threes. As I soaked in the bath I heard the words, "Audiam Vocem", speak out loud, give voice. This has been a recurring piece for me, but I had never really awakened to the power that resonates from the spoken word. Now I was talking to myself and all others who were in attendance, there were definitely spirits there, mostly ancestral, and then I broke down.

A wise man once told me that one must breakdown before they can breakthrough. On this morning I learned the full import of his words, I broke. I began talking to my Grandmother and I cried in a way that I have not cried in many years. I sobbed from the bottom of my soul for my loss, my shame, and my love. She is physically gone, never to return, no more hugs, her smell gone, LOSS. I did not visit her enough as an adult, and I cannot reverse that, SHAME. She will always be with me dispensing wisdom and guiding me, LOVE. Then my head cracked wide open.

I found myself in a quiet wisdom the likes of which I have never known. At that moment I knew the stomach issues have that plagued me since I found out she was departing, disappeared. I had been holding in so much it was making me sick. A bit of tobacco given to me with love and intention, shook me into Giving Voice to my inner turmoil and facilitated healing. Healed by Poison because of intention transforming it into Soul Medicine, the essence of the Poison Path, and all shamanic traditions worldwide.

Psychedelics and I have a long history, mostly as a vision questing tool, but this was shamanic healing, something I personally have never experienced. Strange because I have helped many others over the years, now I was being healed by an act of kindness, a medicine plant with intention and the power of speaking out. The closest experience I have to explain how profound this has all been is remembering how profoundly my first psychedelic experience was. That morning after when one knows that they will never look at the world the same way ever again. Like that but with a calm warm loving knowledge of how blessed I am to be here now.

Over the next few days so many wonderful things have been revealed to me, my path opens. I have much to say about the Plants and their medicine, but first I must plant my seeds. I have much to say about Santisima Muerte and San Cipriano, but first I must plant my seeds. There is a Magical Garden that will become my life's work, but first I must plant my seeds. I have begun a major recalibration of my energy and direction, soul sustenance that is manifesting all because of seeds that I have already planted.

High Mowing Ritual

The grass is high, about waist deep, the goldenrod is higher, and the ragweed tops out at 12 -15 feet. Time to mow. This is a ritual that must be done right, there are herbal allies to consult, post mowing libations to procure and chill. So I talk to Joe about the bean and then I eat a muffin with Mary Jane. Fully immersed in the world of the herb, das Krautwelt, if you will, I face the south and thank Fire for not ravaging my land, and offer to stand in his stead as the Harvester. I will also be Woodsman as I clear the understory from the wooded parts of my land and as Hunter I will try to create spaces for certain fowl and small game to be taken more easily. Finally the mowing begins in earnest, a dizzying array of light, sound, heat, and humidity, one is never at the finish as one was at the beginning. Plant resins fill the air and are inhaled by the Harvester. Small vines with thorns tear at the flesh of the Woodsman, releasing their resins, some poisonous into his bloodstream. By now the Hunter has begun to fully assimilate with the Land. He sees the contours, places where small pools of water will gather after the rains, protected spots in the grass where one could easily disappear into the wood, watches as Hawk uses this to his advantage. With resins of plants coursing through his veins and affecting his brain, this man, this being who has transformed himself into a stand in for fire, takes on the role and responsibility as Land husband, the Bodenehemann. In this role he must protect the homestead, and the wild, create a buffer space for them both to adjust to one another. It is this in between role that I love so much, neither fully wild nor fully domesticated, but able transverse both realms, this is where I truly thrive. The end of the day leaves tired, bruised, torn, and triumphant and exhilarated. This is my condition as I enter the family home, Friedengut, and am greeted by the elixir of the gods. A cold frosty fermented brew of grains, seeds, herbs, and resins, that with some help from yeast render a concoction that is the essence of the mown land itself. I shower and retire to hearth for the evening.

Going Feral and Half Earth

It all started when I was eight years old standing in the prairie land of Katy, Texas, just west of Houston. That was 1976, and I was there because my father was building houses on what used to be grazing land next to a rice farm. The rice farms and grazing lands are all gone now, paved over and forgotten by all but a few. It was there and then I decided that I was anti-"progress". My grand vision was to become wealthy and buy all the land I could, tear down anything human on it and let Nature exist uninterrupted by humans. I didn't know it then, but the land was speaking to me, no it was pleading to me to protect her. thirty Eight years later and I still hear her call. That is just one of the many reasons I support the efforts of groups like the Native Prairies Association of Texas.

I never let go of that idea and over the years met others of a like mind, but all we ever did was talk about how grand it would be if everyone shared this idea. Then I read Rewilding Witchcraft by Peter Grey and those old stirrings started to come to the surface again, I even mentioned it in my Savage Sorcery post. Like many different souls within our greater community of witches, I agreed wholeheartedly with Mr. Grey, at least in spirit anyways. Beyond that I have been searching for ways to revive my vision and manifest it, enter this months issue of Smithsonian Magazine.

This months issue is perhaps one of the greatest mainstream media pieces about Pagan topics presented in a non judgmental way I have ever seen. The cover article is about new discoveries at Stonehenge, there is an article about a 9000 year old North American mans remains and the article that captured my heart; a piece about biodiversity expert E.O. Wilson. The article in question is titled "Can The World Really Set Aside Half The Planet For Wildlife?" My resounding answer is YES. In fact, I believe along with many others that if we are to survive we have no choice but to do this. Please read this article and the one on Rewilding Witchcraft, these are the issues of most importance to our ongoing survival.

After reading the Smithsonian article, I was renewed with passion for my old vision. Heartened by the knowledge that others not only shared this vision but were actually working to make Half Earth a reality, I began doing research to discover what I could do to help. Currently financial support is all I can lend but without money nothing happens in our current environment. I found the following groups to contribute to; the Rewilding Institute, the Rewilding Foundation, Rewilding Europe, and Rewilding the World. The last site also has news from all over the world, letting one keep up on progress being made.

Lest one think that I am anti-human or anti-civilization, let me introduce the Rewilding of Humans. The ReWild University and Rewild Portland are two great examples of this ethos. Being both a Green Anarchist, and an Anarcho-Primitivist, I have a more extreme vision than most, but I am cognizant enough to realize that everything starts with baby steps. Although I do feel strongly that Rewilding will lead us to a more anarchistic state of being. I guess I am a bit opposed to "civilization" as it currently exists, in order to be truly civilized the rights of all creatures must be respected.

I would like to introduce you to fellow from my ancestral homeland of Wales, George Monbiot. His Manifesto for Rewilding the World is a must read for anyone interested in the topic. Perhaps not as exciting as Mr. Grey's piece but still essential reading. I would also recommend Mr. Monbiot's book Feral: Searching for Enchantment on the Frontiers of Rewilding, and judging from the essays on his website I am sure this will be a welcome addition to any animist's library.

I am going feral, in the best sense of the word, that of having escaped domestication and going wild. We humans are only domestic primates after all, and not very good at it. I believe that if we can Rewild the world and ourselves with it we will finally be truly civilized, not merely domesticated.

Earth Workings and The Lesson of the Nazarene

First let me start off with a brief description of my initial Earth Workings. Over the Memorial Day Weekend I attended Flipside, the largest regional burn outside of Burning Man. I participate in burns because they encapsulate the ideals of Open Source Culture better than any other place I have been. This year for the second year in a row we took our children. Children are perfect avatars of the divine principle of Lila, which is Divine Play. If you have forgotten how to play and therefore lost some of that magickal shine hang out with some kids they will teach you all about Immediacy. It was in this setting that Earth yielded its first lesson, the magick of connectivity with positive humanity. There were many wonderful conversations, sword fights, balloon animals, bubble machines, a city that appeared in an enchanted forest and disappeared several days later, not to mention the pirates, unicorns and fairies, all of this temporarily existed as a manifestation of many individuals collective imagination. Better than Disneyland.

So Earth has begun revealing to me the underlying principle of magick everyday, all of creation is a miracle. Physics, mathematics, chemistry can all describe some of what is going on, but not why. Yes I know cause and effect, but what is the purpose? It is this ongoing question that fuels our imaginations and feeds our souls. it is the culmination of Intellect fired by Passion and cooled through our Emotive Selves that manifests as Earthy goodness.To often we get caught in the other realms, intellect, passion, emotions, are all wonderful in themselves , but when one becomes obsessed these elements reveal their dark side. I should clarify, obsession is what ultimately makes things ugly, however there is a cure. Remaining grounded, doing the routine maintenance, tending your garden, whatever you call it the important thing is to do it.

Now I am not so naive as to suggest that grounding will heal everyone, nor am I naive enough to claim its counter, suffice to say, it works most of the time. You will find all kinds of rituals on the interwebz  for grounding, but I want to offer you three  Open Source Magickal workings that have a lifetime of benefit. First, stretch, either with yoga or plain stretching, it will keep you limber. Next, go for a walk, it will keep you connected to nature, even human nature. The change in perspective will inform your magick better than any book, and it will also benefit your health. Not to mention the psychological benefits. God how I love brain chemistry. you should try to do the preceding rituals daily if possible or at least three times a week. Now the last grounding technique is as needed, but I suggest that you try it as soon as possible, go get dirty. I don't mean to do gardening or touch some potting soil, what I mean is play in some mud, or a sand box, or go to the ocean and play in the mud and the sand. In fact the beach is the perfect natural environment to experience all of the elements at once. Be aware wild mud has parasites, so boost up your vermifuge intake. Earthy wisdom is also the domain of one of my favorite Theriocephalic Godforms, Ganapati, but more on that later.

The Lesson of the Nazarene

While at the aforementioned burn event, I learned that a friend was in the process of losing his Grandmother. Having just gone through the process a mere two weeks earlier, it allowed for an interesting opportunity for conversation. Most folks will shy away from such conversations, but not Goose,which is one of the reasons I love him. Out of respect for both of us I will not divulge the intimate details of that conversation, but I will tell you about a revelation that was the direct result of that conversation.

Everyday at the event I did a Pronoia Love Circle, here is the flyer I made.

In the midst of talking about Pronoia and Love, I have a deep conversation with a friend about Life, Death, and Spirituality. Part of that conversation turned to the faith of our Grandmothers, so I began to ponder the message of the Nazarene. Over and over he talks of Love, equating it with  the divine. If we are to be alignment with the divine we must strive to be open to love. When we fully give ourselves over to this Love we are free from fear. The more you love the less you fear. Simple and effective. As I went about spreading good cheer, messages of Love and Pronoia, and hugs, I noticed all the love I felt in return. That's the thing  about Love you have to give it away to get more.

The lesson I learned is this; the Divine is Love, to participate in the divine, start loving, and all things even people whose political views you hate, you don't have to agree with someone to love them, just love that they too have a spark of the divine in them. When show love to even the most detestable of people we grow and love triumphs, this will not undo their acts or make them better people, but it will make you more humane.

Earth has been a profound and subtle reminder of the Magick that exists around me everyday. I will try not to take it for granted. Many blessed returns, now go play in the dirt!

Consumer Vagaries

So I spent the day floating through the Common Fantasy. That vague place where the consumer and that which is consumed reflect one another until one is not sure which is the original and which is the reflection.  As I perused the beginnings of the great consumer orgasm more commonly known as Christ Mass, I was struck by the overwhelming presence of the Fantastic. Vampires, witches, angels, fairies, elves, and superheroes, all at the toy store. Also wandering across the television screen and through adult books, and at the Mass consumer outlets, the fantastic was everywhere in full bloom. All of this was both comforting and discomforting at the same time. Fantastic sure, but not organic, co-opted and packaged for sale by the great Whore Babalon herself, American Consumerism. Now I am not so shallow or naive enough to believe this is an all top down type situation. If we (the collective We, not necessarily you and I) do not buy these plastic distractions then the Cash Hoarders would not sell them. Here are some examples of the sorts of things I saw today:

 

And This:

This is just the tip of the iceberg, ABC network alone boasts Once Upon a Time, Once Upon a Time in Wonderland, Marvels Agents of Shield, there is a remake of the Munsters starring Eddie Izzard as Grandpa and who could forget Walking Dead. Add to this ongoing discussions of Illuminati imagery in Pop culture, and artisinal spirituality for hipsters, and the Year of the Witch is indeed shaping up to be  a very weird one indeed.

 Some of this is not new, but the accelerated crush of consumerism at this time of year coupled with strange currents of the Fantatsic seem to hint at a  boredom with the status quo that mere repetitions of Holiday banality will not cure. Problem is that instead of taking the time to encounter the truly Fantastic either in the Outer or Inner Wilderness, most humans are somnambulistic enough to consume crap in a desperate attempt to fill the void. So here we are once again at the crossroads between experience and ersatz representations of the the strange to convince the Zombtatstic masses that they are not really walking dead. I prefer a sincere Catholic, Hell I prefer a rabid Baptist for that matter to a blind agnostic so called intellectual. It is all about the passion. 

True Magick, true Sorcery HAPPENS in the doing. There is no product, book, or guru who can do it for you, the hard work is all yours; own it. One of the best articles on how its done is this one I read by Jason Louv. Do yourself a favor and read it. He intended for those in their twenties but as one in my forties I felt I knew people my age who could benefit from it. There are no shortcuts, it is a lonely road and ultimately its your road alone. By the way I bought the Mermaid and Witch Zelfs, my altar needs some whimsy.

Season of the Hunt

The Nights are cooler and the leaves are turning and falling to the ground, the season has changed. In this time of the year many turn to thoughts of the holidays with all the attendant ritual that their traditions require. There is another ritual enacted at this time of the year that seems to get ignored or vilified far too often, I speak of The Hunt. The Hunt and the Huntsman are such an integral part of humanity and it's myths, that one need not hunt for very long to find tales of The Hunt. A simple Google search will render much useful information, but I want to talk of the hunt from a ritual perspective and explain the profound power and responsibility of being a huntsman. Come into the woods with me.

Look at the image above, do you feel like getting lost there? Probably not, it would not take long for something to take notice of you, something that could eat you. One of the first thing the Hunter knows is that everything is Hunter and Hunted. The real challenge would be finding woods like these, not many left in the world. These are old growth forests, primeval and untamed, now a days mostly isolated and clinging to survival . Enter the Huntsman, a common theme in huntsman myths, is the idea of the huntsman being the barrier between order and chaos, the Forest and civilization. He was understood to be a guardian figure who both protected civilization from the beasts in the woods, but also protected the forest from the ravages of civilization. There is a sacred trust which must be fulfilled by the huntsman, One may take what one needs to survive from the land, but one must return something to the land. Protecting the land from wanton destruction was and still should be viewed as a sacred act.The reason is simple, our home is disappearing.

 

 This map from the USDA Forestry Service pretty much sums up how bad the situation has become. The Hunt is a sacred bond that ties the Hunter to the land and if the Hunter does not protect the land, there will be no Hunt. No rites of passage in the woods on a late Autumn afternoon. As the wild world slips away, something vital and important fades inside of humanity. Fight for the forests, fight for the Hunt, fight for our future. As long as there is wildness in me I will fight for the forest and all who live there, if you want to help follow the links below. You cannot become one with the Primeval Earth if there are no vestiges of it left. Do your sacred duty answer the Call of the Wild.

http://www.oldgrowthforest.net/

http://www.fseee.org/index.php/stay-informed/projects/1002599

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wild_Hunt

http://www.pitt.edu/~dash/huntsman.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_hunting_deities

Obsessions and Shadows

When I began my elemental workings, I started by making Hekate one of my patron deities. My reason for doing this has much to do with the direction my path is currently on versus where I have been in the past. For most of my years I have  considered myself a witch but stuck primarily to Wicca and Neo-Pagan pathways. On my birthday this year, my 45th, I made the decision to follow a more traditional path and thus the relationship with Hekate began. Mostly this was due to the fact she is a goddess of witchcraft and crossroads so it seemed a natural fit. Hekate, is also the goddess of the Underworld and shadows, thus we come to this reason behind this post. In order to move forward in my work I must be open about so of my less desirable tendencies. Admission is the first step to healing. Without further ado, welcome to my nightmare.

I have problems accepting praise. I hear all the criticism but ignore the attendant praise. This has a tendency to make Eeyore look jovial in comparison to myself. I know we are our own worst critics , but trust me when I say  I am the master of self sabotage. Two failed marriages being the tip of the proverbial iceberg.

I am an overgrown man-child with mommy issues. There are so many improper imprints and complexes that I cannot go into them all nor do I want to in this form. There is reason I bring it up, and it is  important that I confess this ugliness, because I must heal from it.I have a horrendous habit of being cruel and abusive to women, especially the ones closest to me. I am currently doing some deep shadow work to overcome my darker impulses and their manifestations. There are two tools I find most helpful, Somatic Experiencing, and Parenthood. Somatic Experiencing, or SE, is a form of bodywork that is particularly useful for healing from trauma. I won't go into my reasons for doing this but I will say that for me it works.

I confess this now because I can no further in my work without learning not to be bastard. The first step was therapy, the second was this confession, the third is changing my relationships. Some very wonderful people have helped me along the way and I look forward to their continued support. Hekate has made me aware of my deficiencies in my relationship to the divine feminine and it all begins with my relationship to femininity. Both outside of and inside of me, yes when I treat femininity in all its forms poorly, I diminish myself because I am also treating my inner feminine poorly. Respect for the other is respect for the self. I can not stress that enough, in fact it bears repeating, respect for the other is  respect for the self. Let it sink in, everyone of us needs to remember this and be reminded until WE all get it. I'll work on mine you work on yours.
One shadow to chase away, money. I must change my relationship with money. I say I hate it too much and it stays away. I don't want more than I need, but I deserve to be comfortable. Life is hard and everyone I know is struggling. I believe if we all start talking about the distribution of wealth in the world we will all benefit. Which is the most revolutionary Magick I can Imagine happening.

 This leads to a topic I read about this week in a blog post titled, "Can Witchcraft Be Revolutionary?", you can read it here. My revolutionary magick would be full disclosure of all the finances in the world, personal, private,corporate, governmental, churches,and bank holdings. Everyone exposed, maybe we could find out some things, for instance, how much money exists in the world? Why is it distributed so unevenly? What is it backed by? How relevant is it? Why are there laws designed to protect the hoarders of wealth?
It is my will and desire to see the world begin to be more honest about resource allocation and distribution. It is wish that I have persuaded others by my example feeble as it may be, to take the chance and share your shadows. Hekate Sotiera goddess savior, liminal Anatolian triple- goddess, continue to show me the benefit of strength through vulnerability, joy from wisdom, and beauty everywhere.
So Shadows and Obsessions has been a bit heavy on the shadow and not so the Obsessions, well that is about to change. My actual obsessions are probably to numerous to discuss here, but then again I am sometimes dramatic. Double edged sword that it is. My obsessions in order, Art, Tiki Culture, Comics,and Clothes.

I enjoy all art, but mostly Lowbrow Art; Hot Rods, Carnival Art, Tiki Art, Pigors, Roth, and anything that Burns. I also enjoy spiritual art, by Masters like Grey, Johfra, and Susan Seddon-Boulet, you'll thank for that last one. When it comes to Tiki Art I am completely bowled over by Heather Watts, and Shag.
My obsession with Tiki carries over into a love of rum based cocktails, Tiki Mugs, and Tiki Bars. I even own a few Mugs and have collected my own in the wild at a Tiki Bar in Las Vegas. Enough about that, I have considered starting a Tiki blog.
Comics, well I should probably just talk about that in another post. I will mention a few favorites, Silver Surfer, HATE!, and of course Weirdo, by Crumb. Too many more to mention will discuss in future, possibly also a blog of its own.
My biggest shame, clothes. I love shoes, I love costumes, I love clothes. This is my inner gay man, we all have one, mine loves clothes. I am addicted to buying shoes, tshirts, suit jackets, sweaters, and sorts of costume accessories. I call them that because there is no other name for an antlered helm,  face paint, skirts, tutus, masks, and every kind of hat from Sombrero to Fez. Shoes, you can never have enough, I want this whole collection. My problem is that all of my obsessions is that are based on consumptive practices and lack substantive self narrative.
Just as I work to free myself of self sabotage and abusive behaviors, so too I turn from my obsessions. I find value in teaching my son how to build things, encouraging my daughter to sing her own song, and teaching them both that experience is more important than possessions.We play chess together and music, my son encourages me to make my own Art, and my daughter shows me how to make costumes from paper bags, and feathers. I am learning a new language, and soon will make my own shoes.
Contemplation of and interaction with Hekate has lead me examine my shadows and obsessions more closely. This careful study has shown me a path to self transformation through confrontation of my darker tendencies. There is definitely more to come, but I welcome the challenge.

The Magick of Linguistics

My ancestral tongue is Welsh or Cymraeg, as it is known in this particular Brythonic branch of the Celtic languages. As my path delves deeper and deeper into the Traditional Witchcraft of Wales and Cornwall, I find myself longing to learn the tongue of my ancestors. Just as I decided to delve into something more authentic and less New Age (rhymes with sewage) than Wicca, so I find myself reading the Mabinogion, I begin to wonder how much it must differ in Cymraeg. Languages are reality tunnels, as Robert Anton Wilson has so poignantly discussed. To continue my quest for understanding the authentic traditions of my ancestors I now am compelled to learn a new yet old language. Knowing myself the way I do, I also know that this will mean forays into traditional foodstuffs as well, although I will probably skip on "lights". I have already begun own form of Resh that gives honor to Olwen the Cymru goddess of the sun and Mani a Germanic god of the moon (more on that in another post.) I know Resh is not authentic to the traditions of my ancestors but is also not Wiccan, and my path is a solitary and crooked. So into the books I shall dive, the rites of air urging me ever forward into the realms of knowledge. Keep up the Great Work.

Further Revelations from the Eastern Portal

AIR: To Know, Inspiration, and Wisdom

Thoughts on the Environment, Magick,  and the Immediacy of Experience

This post is a bit long and is broken into different sections. The first will deal with new knowledge of my surrounding countryside and the effect of erroneous environmental policies upon that land. The second topic is my ongoing work with rituals of an elemental nature, which at this time is air. The final area covered is access to new knowledge that has helped me to incorporate the previous two and develop a plan for future workings.

Water Water Everywhere Not a Drop Potable

Despite the widespread use of the practice, and the risks hydraulic fracturing poses to human health and safe drinking water supplies, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency ("EPA") does not regulate the injection of fracturing fluids under the Safe Drinking Water Act.
The oil and gas industry is the only industry in America that is allowed by EPA to inject known hazardous materials -- unchecked -- directly into or adjacent to underground drinking water supplies.
- See more at: http://www.earthworksaction.org/issues/detail/inadequate_regulation_of_hydraulic_fracturing#.UfsYo23AES4

Despite the widespread use of the practice, and the risks hydraulic fracturing poses to human health and safe drinking water supplies, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency ("EPA") does not regulate the injection of fracturing fluids under the Safe Drinking Water Act.
The oil and gas industry is the only industry in America that is allowed by EPA to inject known hazardous materials -- unchecked -- directly into or adjacent to underground drinking water supplies.
- See more at: http://www.earthworksaction.org/issues/detail/inadequate_regulation_of_hydraulic_fracturing#.UfsYo23AES4

Despite the widespread use of the practice, and the risks hydraulic fracturing poses to human health and safe drinking water supplies, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency ("EPA") does not regulate the injection of fracturing fluids under the Safe Drinking Water Act.
The oil and gas industry is the only industry in America that is allowed by EPA to inject known hazardous materials -- unchecked -- directly into or adjacent to underground drinking water supplies.
- See more at: http://www.earthworksaction.org/issues/detail/inadequate_regulation_of_hydraulic_fracturing#.UfsYo23AES4

Despite the widespread use of the practice, and the risks hydraulic fracturing poses to human health and safe drinking water supplies, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency ("EPA") does not regulate the injection of fracturing fluids under the Safe Drinking Water Act.
The oil and gas industry is the only industry in America that is allowed by EPA to inject known hazardous materials -- unchecked -- directly into or adjacent to underground drinking water supplies.
- See more at: http://www.earthworksaction.org/issues/detail/inadequate_regulation_of_hydraulic_fracturing#.UfsYo23AES4

Despite the widespread use of the practice, and the risks hydraulic fracturing poses to human health and safe drinking water supplies, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency ("EPA") does not regulate the injection of fracturing fluids under the Safe Drinking Water Act.
The oil and gas industry is the only industry in America that is allowed by EPA to inject known hazardous materials -- unchecked -- directly into or adjacent to underground drinking water supplies.
- See more at: http://www.earthworksaction.org/issues/detail/inadequate_regulation_of_hydraulic_fracturing#.UfsYo23AES4

The oil and gas industry is the only industry in America that is allowed by EPA to inject known hazardous materials -- unchecked -- directly into or adjacent to underground drinking water supplies. - See more at: http://www.earthworksaction.org/issues/detail/inadequate_regulation_of_hydraulic_fracturing#.UfsYo23AES4

The oil and gas industry is the only industry in America that is allowed by EPA to inject known hazardous materials -- unchecked -- directly into or adjacent to underground drinking water supplies. - See more at: http://www.earthworksaction.org/issues/detail/inadequate_regulation_of_hydraulic_fracturing#.UfsYo23AES4

The oil and gas industry is the only industry allowed by the EPA to inject hazardous chemicals directly into the water supply. In 2005, at the urging of Vice President Dick Cheney, Congress created the so-called "Halliburton loophole" to clean water protections in federal law to prevent the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency from regulating this process, despite serious concerns that were raised about the chemicals used in the process and its demonstrated spoiling and contamination of drinking water. In 2001, Cheney's "energy task force" had touted the benefits of hydrofracking, while redacting references to human health hazards associated with hydrofracking. Halliburton, which was previously led by Cheney, reportedly earns $1.5 billion a year from its energy operations, which rely substantially on its hydrofracking business.

About two weeks ago while watching a Daily Show episode about the show down at the Texas Capitol, my wife and I saw an interview with director of Gasland. Curious about the movie we found it on the internet and watched it. Realizing that Texas is one of the largest petroleum producing states (Alaska produces more) we did some more research on the internet and found this:

This is a map of disposal wells for hydraulic fracturing, I live near the dark spot northeast of San Antonio. These wells are used to dispose of the toxic soup of chemicals used to fracture the rocks during the extraction process. Compare that map with this map of the major aquifers of Texas.

Take note of the red band, that is the Carrizo - Wilcox Aquifer where my local water comes from. The same area the disposal wells are located. We decided that we should change our water filters and that is when the real horror began.

The filter on the right is brand new, the filter on the left is the old one. Normally these filters last six months and are light gray when I change them. This one is five months old, stinks and is dark brown. We also saved water from the filter housing which has brown particulate matter in it. We will be sending this off for analysis.
Do the research, this is happening everywhere, your water may not be safe.

Connections with the Spirits of Air

On a happier note, my elemental working have been progressing nicely. I have developed a relationship with an air elemental who has presented herself to me. This is an illustration I made of her.

Beautiful isn't she? Since our contact many birds have been presenting themselves to me and communicating. Owls, crows, vultures, hawks and roadrunners have crossed my path many times in the past few weeks, including three owls in one place at the same time during the day. These weekly workings and daily meditations have opened paths of knowledge lead to deeper understandings of herb-lore, native spirits, and atavistic cthonic currents. These currents have shed light on the origins of Tubal Cain, Germanic lore, root-work, Camino Ambre, and the need to construct a new wand. As a practitioner of Traditional Craft and one who walks a crooked path, I can honestly say these last few months have been some of the most amazing in my many years of practice. Many praises to Hekate and Herne,and much thanks to those who give me inspiration, John Halcyon, T Thorn Coyle,Sarah Anne Lawless, and Robert Artisson .

Increasing Knowledge and the Ethics of Responsibility

When one becomes aware of situations that are dangerous to self and community an obligation to reveal this truth is imperative. To do less than this is not only negligent but irresponsible. When that same individual is a practitioner of nature based spiritual systems this becomes a moral imperative. So now I share information with others via the internet, in person, and join campaigns to make petroleum companies better stewards of the planet they exploit for profit. We are all indigenous spirits of Spaceship Earth and as such we  must take care of our home as an extension of our spirituality. Now the earnest work begins, rituals of healing, public workings to draw attention, and dissemination of knowledge. I must engage others and show them why they should care. I plan to use Humor, Magick, and Knowledge to combat my enemy.

This is spiritual warfare on the material plane, clean air, clean water, and clean food are the birthright of every human alive. This about more than my local environs, this is being a voice for my animal allies and plant family, my sustainers, my healers. The aether that flows through us all gives the strength to change our world , but it must be tempered with the knowledge of limits, the passion to do right, the empathic urge to care for nature and the practical skill to responsibly work with nature to ensure the survival of all living things. Everything depends upon it.

Final Thoughts

Take a few moments every day to meditate upon the current condition of our planet, and how you would like to see it improve. Construct rituals of environmental healing, sacred compost piles, volunteer recycle bins at your bus stop, encourage people to test their water. Create sigils that contain links to websites about hydraulic fracturing. Perform theatrical rituals in public to exorcise the demons from the water. These are some the of ideas I have developed, feel free to create your own. We must use everything at our disposal to ensure our mutual existence. Have good cheer and keep up the Great Work.

LOVE, Racism, And Media Manipulation

I'm not sure where to start really, but I will say that the situation is not as hopeless as it seems. Let me say a few things about Trayvon Martin, I hope to offer a perspective that few others have. T Thorn Coyle in her article, Confronting Racism is Spiritual Work, makes a great argument for considering this incident from a spiritual perspective. Her argument is not that we should turn this over to the Divine in hopes of a solution from on high, but rather we should solve the problem of racism as a matter of respect for the Creator. God Herself is watching to see how we handle this and many others matters on this planet. You see the way we treat creation is a reflection of our spiritual values. The reason so many people in modern society have disdain for the institutions of faith is that so many of them have violated the position of trust with which they have been vested. When people of Good Faith, regardless of tradition, begin to work together for the good of all, there will be no problem that cannot be healed by them. 

Let me get back to the Trayvon Martin tragedy for a moment, why is this important? On one level it matters because of the subtext of race and suspicion in America, for instance many Americans of European Heritage (I refuse to use "white" as it is an artifice)  have just learned about "the talk". As a punk rock son of of a baby boomer, I was given a similar talk in my teen years, although mine was a lot more about my choices and how they would be perceived rather than about how I would be perceived because of my skin color. The more disturbing aspect of this story, in my opinion, is the way the media chose to manipulate all of us with this tragedy. One of the main reasons it made the national headlines was because it involved racial tension, and nothing distracts people from the facts more than emotion. Reread that sentence. Yes I really believe that the national media in this country emotionally manipulates all of us away from the truth and exploits the weak spots in our national character. We as a nation keeping avoiding "the talk" about racial justice, inequality, and the nature of love.

Love? Yes, that thorny four letter word that Visionaries like Jesus, John Lennon, Mother Jones, and Ira Sendler use so eloquently. The reason that I bring up love is that I believe it is the only thing that will cure this illness. I'm talking about love as a real world skill that must be practiced in order to realize its full expression. If one does not practice what Erich Fromm calls "an act of will", one loses a sense of connectivity to others and fails to find fulfillment. The most successful way to develop trust and strengthen ties with others is communication. Only love can open one up to have the soul searching conversation this illness demands. It must start with people of European descent. We must give up the vestiges of privilege that the artifice of "whiteness" conveys. We must love our fellow humans enough to stop the injustices committed by the cultural imperialism of ages long past. We must accept that we can affect change only within ourselves and that there are many voices in this conversation. We must take responsibility for our wrongs, either by listening or educating. We must be willing to stand with our brothers and sisters against injustice. Love will guide us all towards these goals. Love can no longer be a platitude we give lip service in the houses of the holy, it must become a rally point for action.

This is why the media will continue to highlight these cases and ignore gun violence in general. When speaking of teen deaths alone the numbers are far too high, but when you start looking at all gun related deaths it is simply tragic. Why is it that every media outlet in the country was all over the Martin/Zimmerman case but only the Huffington Post  has carried the story of Temar Boggs on a national level? Because of our susceptibility. Yes, that's right, as long as we continue to let the media manipulate us through our fears, prejudices, and  lack of compassion, they will continue to do so.I have seen internet memes that ask what if Mr. Zimmerman offered Mr. Martin a ride home that night, would the outcome have been different? I don't know, but if Mr. Zimmerman had just once broke down and cried over the fact that he killed another human being, regardless of race and age, maybe we would be having a very different conversation.

I believe, and this only my opinion, that the utter lack of compassion shown by Mr. Zimmerman is why so many can not accept the verdict. The jury did what they believed to be right under Florida law, which is the real miscarriage of justice. The Stand Your Ground Law (SYGL) is not about love or compassion. It is sad that our society has gotten to a place where we are legally sanctioning murder, and members of our nation applaud it. This is on American soil and has nothing to do with drones. We as a society have begun to say that life is so insignificant that if you feel sufficiently threatened by someone you can kill them.That was Marissa Alexanders mistake, she did not kill her husband, so the state of Florida punished her for respecting life. Yes it is that simple, and no I am not being dramatic. The facts are there.

Back to love. Here we are in a nation that claims to build its laws and ethics on a Christian foundation. I am not strictly christian nor am I anti christian, many great things, such as the abolitionist movement, for example, were accomplished by christians throughout time, as were horrors. So I maintain a fairly neutral stance on christianity. That being said, one of the basic tenets of the christian faith is respect for life, right there in Exodus 20:13 "Thou shall not Kill". Then Jesus commanded his followers to love one another as they loved themselves. So why do we as a nation have laws sanctioning murder? Fear of love. Love erases boundaries, class distinctions, and bonds us together as humans. With love we get to actually appreciate one another as individuals rather than a race, an age, a social class, or any division our minds can devise. There is no longer a need for hierarchy based on artifice. Will some lose their privilege? I guess, if you call coercion reinforced by violence a privilege. That is what racism is, the erroneous belief that by accident of birth one has the right to devalue another life and to build institutions of power to reinforce this so called right.

In the spirit of George Carlin, I will call this what it is: HORSE SHIT. Most of the time I do not condone vulgarity when trying to make a reasoned argument, especially about love, but sometimes the truth can not be expressed in any other way.When we are brave enough to love in a manner that allows us to be vulnerable, to be empathetic, open to other perspectives, perhaps we will heal not only our wounds but others wounds as well. When we can honestly in perfect love and perfect trust enter into each others houses, with a willingness to help and to learn, then we will grow the flower of love. Goddess bless you all.

Death Be Not Proud

In the article, Death and Dignity – A Case of Individualized Decision Making, by Dr. Timothy E. Quill, the author asserts that the issues surrounding physician assisted suicide are complicated and should be considered in the context of giving terminally ill patients the most dignity possible during the final months of their lives so that they may die with the least amount of suffering possible.


Currently the laws of all states except Oregon forbid physician assisted suicide, or euthanasia, as it is technically known. The moral and ethical considerations of this topic, are very complex and highly personal, but should be addressed by society as a whole. Many physicians secretly assist their terminal patients with their requests for barbiturates and pain killers to ease the terror and pain of dying. The Hemlock Society argues for the legalization of euthanasia to free it from the stigmatization that secrecy lends. Many terminal patients who choose this route face death alone, or with ill equipped family members. Doctors are faced with many difficult decisions when they choose to help either directly or indirectly, the loss of medical licenses, expulsion from their profession, and even criminal charges are chief amongst them. All of these aspects of euthanasia also bring to the forefront the essential question; do we as individual deserve to decide how and when we die, and what does the answer to that question say about our society?

Euthanasia is very difficult subject to have hard and clear opinions about, most people believe in compassion and ease of suffering, but how does one define dignity or justify suicide? In our current legal environment, many people are suffering needlessly and alone through death, when they could be tenderly cared for and treated with dignity. In the following statement, “Suffering can be lessened to some extent, but in no way eliminated or made benign, by the careful intervention of a competent, caring physician, given current social constraints.” the author reveals his belief that terminally ill patients do indeed deserve a dignified death. Quill goes on to say, “Prolonged dying can occasionally be peaceful, but more often the role of the physician and the family is limited to lessening but not eliminating severe suffering.” Here I believe that he arguing for the use of barbiturates and pain killers administered in a compassionate way to lessen the pain and terror of death. This article also supports the idea that in the current atmosphere of hostile jurisprudence many people are cut off from their family and friends and left to make these hard decisions alone, this is clearly evidenced in the following passage:

“I wonder whether Diane struggled in that last hour, and whether the Hemlock Society’s way of death by suicide is the most benign. I wonder why Diane, who gave so much to so many of us, had to be alone for the last hour of her life.”

The conclusion seems to be that such a death, while self directed may be less than fully dignified.

I for one fully support the right of terminal patients to choose euthanasia, as a viable alternative to prolonged suffering. If our society can learn to face death honestly and without fear, perhaps we will begin to value life as more precious gift. Perhaps a death free from terror and pain could lead us to consider the deeper questions death brings. Questions such as, what is dignity, and who deserves it, why do we fear the inevitable and what is really on the other side, if anything at all. When we begin to treat the dying with dignity and value the importance of lessening suffering for terminally ill patients, then and perhaps only then we will begin to treat the living with dignity and value the lessening of suffering for all individuals. As novel as it may seem I honestly believe that we can have a society based on compassion and that dignity for the dying can lead us there.

Society must confront these difficult decisions and codify them into law. Ignoring this subject will lead to more secret death, more individuals needlessly suffering alone. Dignity is something we all deserve in life and in death, whether by natural causes or assisted in physician sanctioned fully legal dying centers. The time has come for humanity to grow up and fearlessly face that fate that awaits us all. I hope that others will join me and Dr. Quill in support of compassionate euthanasia.